Page 2 of 2

Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Fri Oct 23, 2020 2:20 am
by Ventilator
Nick's highlights wrote:I think about making a post and then decide its best to continue not posting for the year.

I can say is that in the years that people where haven't seen me, not much has changed.

I'm honestly not much for keeping up with people individually, I find it a lot easier when they're in a group, so when the groups all slowly died I lost contact with a fair number of you.

That is an excellent summary, Nick. Pretty much this, as well as the part about the changing digital landscape. I'm finding I'm guilty of the first part up there too. I just deleted like two paragraphs of things I wanted to talk about, but after putting it to words, I didn't feel I wanted to talk about it anymore.

Not gonna lie, those 40 or so people you alluded to, I would be interested in their take on world events in 2020. Likely about 40 or so variations of "shit sucks" but they'd be interesting to read.


Nick wrote:This entire post was just an elaborate excuse to change the thread topic again to respond to inferno's thread topic.

That's a nostalgic feeling right there. I havent seen a "Kai sucks" "Rev wins" or "Synk's Ass++" in a long time. I must admit, that did put a smile on my face!

Re: So how about that, uh, everything lately?

PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2020 1:05 pm
by dexeron
I'm honestly not much for keeping up with people individually, I find it a lot easier when they're in a group,


Discord's been useful for that sort of thing these days, but even with that it's hard to keep track of a bajillion people across a thousand different niche interests. And honestly way too many Discords are like this place. Occasional message that gets some traffic, and then quiet until something else comes up. As much of a hell-site as Twitter is, that's probably why I stick around there. There's always content.

It really makes me jones for more in-person interaction with the handful of people I'm really close with, but that's way harder now with everything going on in the world. I actually got to see some folks for the first time in almost a year last weekend. I forgot how great that is.

Re: So how about that, uh, everything lately?

PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2020 11:07 pm
by Ventilator
dexeron wrote:Discord's been useful for that sort of thing these days, but even with that it's hard to keep track of a bajillion people across a thousand different niche interests. And honestly way too many Discords are like this place. Occasional message that gets some traffic, and then quiet until something else comes up.


It really feels like social media gutted the venerable general discussion internet forum and now everything is a niche forum with low traffic, or a subreddit.

At least discord is solving the gap that xbox live left after the 360 became obsolete, and most of my gaming buddies switched platforms. Now it doesn't matter, I can keep up with people despite the lack of common ground. Any old smartphone can run discord. It's just that most of my discord time is on the one my group of personal friends and family use, and all the other servers are those lesser posted ones you mentioned.

dexeron wrote:It really makes me jones for more in-person interaction with the handful of people I'm really close with, but that's way harder now with everything going on in the world. I actually got to see some folks for the first time in almost a year last weekend. I forgot how great that is.


I dont think many of us get out very much with the whole pandemic thing, and now that the season's are getting colder, that's probably not going to improve until maybe spring. Whenever I do get out, I'm finding I really appreciate my time away from home.

The thing I miss most though is my gym. I have a membership in a small local one, and I got to know a lot of people there. I haven't stepped foot in there so long that I'm starting to forget the names and faces of the members. I cant even walk the park I live near because every single time I drive by I see a ton of people going maskless. I have some basic equipment at home but even with that it isn't the same. I miss the social element.

Re: Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2020 4:35 am
by Samurai
He's racked up quite a few plusses over time, that's for sure. :)

Ventilator wrote:
Nick's highlights wrote:I think about making a post and then decide its best to continue not posting for the year.

I can say is that in the years that people where haven't seen me, not much has changed.

I'm honestly not much for keeping up with people individually, I find it a lot easier when they're in a group, so when the groups all slowly died I lost contact with a fair number of you.

That is an excellent summary, Nick. Pretty much this, as well as the part about the changing digital landscape. I'm finding I'm guilty of the first part up there too. I just deleted like two paragraphs of things I wanted to talk about, but after putting it to words, I didn't feel I wanted to talk about it anymore.

Not gonna lie, those 40 or so people you alluded to, I would be interested in their take on world events in 2020. Likely about 40 or so variations of "shit sucks" but they'd be interesting to read.


I definitely don't have as much time to ruminate online about stuff that catches my interest these days*. A few years ago, some might recall, virtually every one of my posts that wasn't a one-liner ran for at least five paragraphs. These days it seems to take more effort to put a lot of words on the screen, which is one of the reasons I'm so hopeless at answering emails. I can't treat it like SMS and always feel I have to bash out something more akin to an old-school letter, so I end up procrastinating about it.

As with you both, I'm also much more likely to stick around forums where I chat to a lot of people than where there are only one or two. I like to see what old friends are up to and there are a number I'd undoubtedly have drifted away from without 'tinternet as physical distance and family life gradually reduce the size of our social circles. For many Gen Xers like me and early Millennials, that means Facebook -- awful thing though it is, there's simply no other medium with as many people I know using it, and real-time interactions like Discord don't work across multiple time zones. But even on Facebook I'm fairly quiet, and have noted the other BOBs I've linked with there are generally in a similar position**.

Family is where life is at these days for quite a few of us, particularly the breeders. ;) My young man is now 10 and has severe learning disabilities so most of my non-working time is spent with him, but he's been doing brilliantly in the past six months or so, despite the lockdown. It's been a great shame my parents have only been able to see us via Zoom (they're shielding as Dad has a nasty cardiovascular condition) and so couldn't really see how he's taught himself to do new things -- they've had to rely on us telling them. My sister has continued to be an awesome grade school teacher in some very challenging circumstances, and my wife has been keeping the lad occupied through the school summer vacation while I've been working from home. I'm proud of them all.

But we've only been able to achieve what we have because I've been lucky enough to have continuing, non-furloughed work (there is, you'll be amazed to know, plenty to do in NHS communications just now), the young man is on a good balance of medication to help him be him rather than a doped-up zombie or rage monster, and the social care we've received from our local authority has allowed my wife and I to be a couple as well as parents/carers, and that's been invaluable for our relationship.

Which leads me neatly on to the state of the world. We've always had a reasonable political mix here, from anarchosocialists (hi, Desp!) to staunch conservatives and even the odd libertarian fruit-loop, but I've found my politics drifting gradually left over time, and there seems to be a general trend of that -- research is suggesting that the age people are most likely to move towards more right-wing views is going up, which is worrying for conservative politicians as they've historically relied on older people's support. The ageing population will keep them going for a while, but if trends continue demographic changes will get them in the end. Which is one of the reasons, I suspect, populist hard right politics is pushing so hard to embed their power base now. They might not have another chance.

All this assumes we're not in some kind of Mad Max post-apocalypse in 50 to 100 years' time, of course. Arctic ice is in precipitous decline, which will multiply the feedback loop that's starting to melt Arctic permafrost too. This, for those not aware, is very bad news indeed.

I've been by turns furious, saddened and despairing about how hatred, anti-intellectualism and nationalist exceptionalism have been whipped up by authoritarian populists like Trump, Xi, Putin, Bolsonaro, Erdoğan, Duerte and Orbán (and the Farage/Johnson/Cummings axis here in the UK). The list is simply too long and awful to go through here, but at the top of it (simply due to the threat to all of us that it presents) is the indifference of all these people to and in many cases even outright denial of extreme environmental degradation -- the greatest existential threat we've faced as a species and a biosphere more generally in recorded history.

On a smaller scale, I always wondered a bit if bringing a child into the world was wise, and with a youngster who can't easily look after himself and the possible disruption of the social safety net in my own country from the twin threats of the pending COVID-19 depression and leaving the world's largest trading bloc, I'm also extremely concerned about what the future will be like for him. Sometimes one has to focus on the personal because the global is just too overwhelming.

There are some causes for hope, in that the US finally seems to be stepping back from the worst excesses of its current government, the global average energy cost for renewables falling below fossil fuels for the first time and concerted international action from groups like Black Lives Matter and Extinction Rebellion. But none of that is enough if humanity and particularly governments don't recognise, real soon now, that we need to take immediate, extensive action -- and we're all responsible for doing so, as this nifty little animation explains.

tl;dr shit sucks

___
* I wrote this post over the course of the entire evening yesterday while I was chasing the young man around the house and then picked it up to finish this morning while he was having breakfast
** Except Dex, who somehow still manages to post essays every few days despite family, work, studies and gaming

Re: Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2020 8:48 am
by dexeron
Samurai wrote:** Except Dex, who somehow still manages to post essays every few days despite family, work, studies and gaming


Screaming something into the void on a regular basis is one way of remaining sane in a world that seemingly has not. ;)

Re: Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2020 12:15 pm
by Samurai
dexeron wrote:Screaming something into the void on a regular basis is one way of remaining sane in a world that seemingly has not. ;)

Hah! Quite so. This seems relevant.

Re: Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Sat Oct 31, 2020 12:33 am
by Ventilator
Samurai wrote:tl;dr shit sucks

You were definitely on the list of those 40 or so BOBs I mentioned and I do thank you for taking time to catch me up in such detail. You really have a taller order than I ever imagined. I think that you’re probably the most qualified to handle life as you described though, with all the calmness and none of the pompousness or arrogance as mentioned in your forum signature.

Back in 2017, when I had my trip to Eruope, I considered catching a lift over to England to go see Iron Maiden and maybe sending you a line to see if you wanted to go. It didn't pan out as I wound up in Romania instead. The notice would have been way too short anyways. I also don't remember you ever saying you were into metal. A last minute invite to a concert, to a band that I don't even know if you're in to or not, that would have been too akward to ask.

dexeron wrote:
Samurai wrote:** Except Dex, who somehow still manages to post essays every few days despite family, work, studies and gaming


Screaming something into the void on a regular basis is one way of remaining sane in a world that seemingly has not. ;)

This is a popular enough solution all over the world. Enough to draw up three Netflix seasons of Aggretsuko anyways.

Re: Anyone got a running tally on the Synk's Ass counter?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 01, 2020 8:16 am
by Samurai
Ventilator wrote:You were definitely on the list of those 40 or so BOBs I mentioned and I do thank you for taking time to catch me up in such detail. You really have a taller order than I ever imagined. I think that you’re probably the most qualified to handle life as you described though, with all the calmness and none of the pompousness or arrogance as mentioned in your forum signature.

I'm honoured by your kind words, though for a time I was a lot less calm a couple of years back, until I realised I was struggling with my own depression and dangerously high blood pressure. Action was taken. :)

None of us is perfect and parenting is always challenging, special needs parenting often moreso, but we're still in a relatively fortunate position. We can make ends meet on one salary so my wife can be our lad's full-time carer (we did discuss doing it the other way round, but with our skill sets my earning potential is higher than hers locally). We live in a country with a reasonable (albeit chronically underfunded for the past decade thanks to our Conservatives) welfare system and safety net. We're able to use the local administrative language well and can effectively complete the large quantities of paperwork that applying benefits can entail (the most recent disability living allowance for our son was the length of a dissertation). We have some savings to fall back on if things get problematic.

Many families of special needs children lack some or all of those things, and are left with very little support as a result. For my own mental wellbeing, I try not to think too much about kids like mine in countries where autism and its common co-morbidities (ADHD, generalised anxiety disorder, sensory processing disorder, developmental delay, communication barriers, joint issues, dyspraxia -- all of which our lad has) are considered illnesses or psychoses to be 'fixed' rather than neurodivergence and disability for which reasonable adjustments can be made. (The US is one of the countries guilty of this, with Autism Speaks a particular culprit.)

And of course in some parts of the world autism and learning disabilities are simply stigmatised and ignored altogether. These are awful situations that I unfortunately don't have the resources to help address because mine are focused on my own family and things I have a realistic chance of influencing.

Thankfully, my lad is making significant developmental and social progress even during the pandemic as a direct (despite heightened anxiety resulting from it) and evidenced result of the support he's been receiving and his own determination -- we're very proud of the young man he's becoming.

Ventilator wrote:Back in 2017, when I had my trip to Eruope, I considered catching a lift over to England to go see Iron Maiden and maybe sending you a line to see if you wanted to go. It didn't pan out as I wound up in Romania instead. The notice would have been way too short anyways. I also don't remember you ever saying you were into metal. A last minute invite to a concert, to a band that I don't even know if you're in to or not, that would have been too akward to ask.


I prefer classic rock and electronica to metal (favourite band: Queen) but I do have a bit of Maiden, Motörhead, Metallica and others on my playlists, and can do what I'd like to think is a decent Axl Rose at karaoke. Concerts and gigs aren't really my thing, though, as my memory is very poor and I tend to forget details of an experience I've paid a fair bit to attend. So when I'm tempted by a band I like, I generally just spend the ticket price on a bunch of albums I can listen to again and again. So I'd have been more than happy to meet up, but would probably have preferred somewhere a little more conducive to chat. ;)

Romania is lovely, friendly (at least in my experience) and steeped in history, so going there was a good call, especially as Britain has been something of a shitshow since our wonderful then-PM decided it was a good idea to give racists and xenophobes a national platform in 2015. You probably picked a good time not to be here!

Ventilator wrote:
dexeron wrote:Screaming something into the void on a regular basis is one way of remaining sane in a world that seemingly has not. ;)

This is a popular enough solution all over the world. Enough to draw up three Netflix seasons of Aggretsuko anyways.

I'd never heard of it till this week (don't have Netflix). Seen it referenced a couple of times over the past couple of days, though, so I might have to give it a look!

Re: So how about that, uh, everything lately?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 01, 2020 9:39 pm
by Ventilator
Samurai wrote:For my own mental wellbeing, I try not to think too much about kids like mine in countries where autism and its common co-morbidities (ADHD, generalised anxiety disorder, sensory processing disorder, developmental delay, communication barriers, joint issues, dyspraxia -- all of which our lad has) are considered illnesses or psychoses to be 'fixed' rather than neurodivergence and disability for which reasonable adjustments can be made. (The US is one of the countries guilty of this, with Autism Speaks a particular culprit.)

And of course in some parts of the world autism and learning disabilities are simply stigmatised and ignored altogether. These are awful situations that I unfortunately don't have the resources to help address because mine are focused on my own family and things I have a realistic chance of influencing.


I was diagnosed as an adult, mid-career during my undergraduate studies, as having ADHD (some anxieties and perhaps a touch of obsessive compulsion as well). I wound up with a bottle of Adderall and quiet, isolated testing environments with extra time on exams. I went from near dropout to never having to repeat another class. I learned back then that I'm just not wired like normal people are expected to be. I'd get my medicine and then my "needs" that I used to not be able to go without slowly dried up and went away. I stopped nervously biting my fingernails. I was cracking and popping my joints much less than before. My conversational skills improved as well, especially when it came to topics that I had little interest in. Lots of little things in my life started to fall into place like a well recovered game of Tetris. New, more acceptable, habits began to form. They wound up staying with me even when I dont take my medicine. I’m glad too, because they replaced a lot of things about my younger self that I’m none too proud of, and would frequently fuel the anxiety and obsessive/compulsive behavior. You know, mad eating circle kind of stuff. Treatment helped break that loop.

Now that I think about it, this was about the time I first dropped off the forum. I no longer required the constant stimulation that this place provided. Huh… I never put two and two together on that before, that I was heavily relying on this place to fill a few gaps in my life back then… aint that something.

I’m not just rambling here. This does circle back to a greater point. Human beings have a remarkable ability to adapt. I went my whole childhood, and a good few years into my adulthood, carrying this problem with me. Like, I was old enough to drink in the States when I found out. I got that far in life without any knowledge of it, or receiving any assistance for it. I was able to do a lot better for myself once I was made aware of the problem and given help coping for it. Your son may have more on his plate to deal with, but they caught it early and he’s got parents that acknowledge the issue and are helping him cope. I think he’ll be fine in the long run. Please keep in mind that he’s going to live life at his own pace, and the learning curve is going to be wonky as all hell. Some days it’ll seem glacial but others it’ll be lightning. Thankfully, people like us tend to have good retention, so the effort put into teaching and development isn’t at all a waste of your time or his.

Samurai wrote:And of course in some parts of the world autism and learning disabilities are simply stigmatised and ignored altogether.


This, this, a thousand times FUCKING THIS! Even in “enlightened”, sunny, southern California. Ignorance is a fucking disease worse than COVID.

Before I get too excited about this particular topic, I want to say that even though there is a shitload of this in the world, the world is evolving. People are getting better about it. People my age and older are pretty bad about respecting these issues unless they have the problem or know somebody with the problem. Younger folks are way better about awareness and respect though. There is hope yet!

Samurai wrote:Romania is lovely, friendly (at least in my experience) and steeped in history, so going there was a good call, especially as Britain has been something of a shitshow since our wonderful then-PM decided it was a good idea to give racists and xenophobes a national platform in 2015. You probably picked a good time not to be here!


That's about what my Uncle told me about Germany. I was originally supposed to go there instead and see where a lot of my dad's side of the family came from. My uncle, who is German, had a talk with me about the rising tensions between locals and the refugfees. Long story short, he convinced me not to go. Looking back on it, the choice between potential race riots and former soviet second world problems was a fairly unique dilemma to deal with.

Samurai wrote:I'd never heard of it till this week (don't have Netflix). Seen it referenced a couple of times over the past couple of days, though, so I might have to give it a look!


I think of it as if Hello Kitty was made for adults dealing with real world, adult level issues, and sometimes feel overwhelmed by it all. I haven't seen all of it yet, but I do recommend it based on what I've seen so far. I think it's pretty good.

Oh, and while I'm at it, if you don't already about an Irish show called Mrs. Browns Boys, watch a bit of season one. One of the best live action comedies I've seen in a long time.

Maybe its good this place was dead for the past 4 years.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 13, 2020 7:48 pm
by Nick
considering how all of November felt like it took 2 years, its one of those times where I actually don't want to hear people talk about it.